And yes, it is federally legal in all 50 Currently In Life I Am Living Somewhere In Between Knuck Shirt! If you have any questions, feel free to ask! i think ull better understand what im saying if you read this. It is not something that i want, its something in my head that starts kicking in. Negative thoughts that i keep fighting over and over.. even though i feel so blessed that i have you.. what triggers my thoughts is what i do not understand. And sometimes i get so sensitive over little things and feel bad about myself about it.. i constantly drive my thoughts away from negativity but it kicks in when im tired alone and no one to talk to. And thats why sometimes i keep bugging you and even if we have senseless conversations or we say the same things over and over it keeps me happy.. and yeah.. thats why this past few days i keep getting myself busy at work and staying up late in the office because i just want my mind to be somewhere else.. and yeah i just wish u have the patience to endure me sometimes when im like this.. and i try my best not to all the time, even though u dnt see it in me. My Anxiety, was the recent Death of my Mother! I blamed myself for weeks, with questions like, "What did I miss?" "What if I did this?" "What did the Doctor's do or didn't do?" I finally realized that God is the only one who has these answers, for it's even said, that he is the ONLY one to know the exact Moment of our passing!
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I'm NOT a very Religious Man, but this sure helped me through one of the most horrific times of my Life! I do know that I'm so blessed to have had her as my Mother, but it helped me to see, just how much I missed my Father, still after 27 years! I take comfort in knowing that they are back together, with our Creator! Thank You for acknowledging that Anxiety comes in all types of Forms. There's times I pull up to the grocery store, needing food for my kids, and I can't go in. Times I have to pee so bad, but I have to walk passed two people, so I'd rather be in pain. Music helps sometimes. I went to counseling and they said bombardment was the answer. That if I continually allowed my body to become extremely anxious, that eventually my body would be unable to sustain that level of anxiety, and it would have to shut down the emotion. Haven't walked into a grocery store alone in over 3 years. Everything can be fine and then I'm standing in line and so lightheaded that I'm getting hot flashes and just fighting not to pass out in front of everyone. People think anxiety is someone looking super nervous, shaking, hyperventilating, etc. For me, anxiety is fighting my hardest to look normal. It's a completely invisible ailment. My friends only know because I talk about it, and some just write me off as being dramatic. I told a friend what I experience, how hard it is for me, and that every time I so much as even leave the house it's an accomplishment.
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Her response was that I need to "try harder". Some people just don't get it. Maybe anxiety is just too broad of a term, and it needs to be separated into different categories. Because what I suffer is not the same Currently In Life I Am Living Somewhere In Between Knuck Shirt as the girl in this article, nor is it the exact same as anyone who I talk to anxiety about.
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